The surf girls get wetsuits

In the continuing fun of watching and reporting on my 2 

friends who've taken up surfing this past summer I'm pleased

to announce that they are now prepared for colder water. 

Their wetsuits have arrived!  

It's so much fun to watch stoke as it grows.  The simple act of

buying a wetsuit, so commonplace to many of us, when seen through

the eyes of the "surf girls" was an exciting adventure that helped them

get through the early October flat spell.  Here on the east coast surf shops

don't stock a lot of women's suits.   Styles and sizes are limited at

even the best shop.  Our girls solved this problem by hitting the road.

They stopped at virtually every surf shop in a 25 mile radius checking

out different styles and sizes, making shopping fun.  In the process they

discovered that trying on wetsuits can be difficult and sweaty job!

After the shopping road trip they hit the internet.  I've learned a thing or 2 

from their research.  They found a shop willing to ship a number of

suits of varying sizes and from different manufacturers for free!  All they

had to do was try the suits on, pick the one they wanted and send the others

back.  How cool is that?  Oh I forgot to mention the 20% discount they got.

Seeing the familiar through the eyes of others can be fun, helpful, and

even therapeutic.  Try to see the world through the eyes of someone

you're having problems with.  It may take away some of the anger.

Now if only I can get certain talk radio hosts, tv political commentators,

and candidates to learn this lesson we'd all be better off.  We could move

from the antagonistic, venomous, hatred that has become such a toxic

part of this presidential election process.  

Seasons change

Yesterday and today clearly signaled a change.

The high temperatures won't get out of the 50's

and the brisk NE wind is making it feel a little too

chilly.  True dawn patrols, the ones at first light

before the sun actually comes up, 

while most of the neighbors are still in bed,

and the only others around are a few fisherman, won't

be happening (at least not in NJ).  Those pleasant

twilight sessions with the lingering conversations as we stroll

back to our cars are done for a while.  Now folks will be

scurrying to turn on the heat and quickly peel

off  their wetsuits.

Seasons change.  Surfers are often more acutely dialed in to the

small and subtle changes.  Each season brings its' own unique qualities,

each helps us enjoy the others. A quiet weekday session with a few

friends watching the geese fly south is special.  A hot cup of coffee being

sipped while checking the surf,  a knit cap pulled over your ears, 

UGG boots warming your toes are all part of what makes fall different, special

in its' own way.

Enjoy each season of your year...each season of your life.

Different tools for different jobs

Some things are really hard to believe.  I live 2 blocks

from the ocean.  Thanks to both a love of the ocean and

a waist line that hasn't really changes in decades I've got

quite a collection of boardshorts.  I don't think I'm unique

in that respect.

One of my neighbors, a hyperactive home

renovation/construction guy, is going to take a trip to

Puerto Rico in  few weeks.  Those of us who know him

are all wondering what he'll do as he's not the type to fish,

swim, snorkel, surf, or see the sights, although he does enjoy

rum.  What's so odd is that, although he lives 2 blocks from

the ocean he does not own a bathing suit.  He has a truck and

garage filled with any and every tool needed to build or fix

anything related to a house, but not one pair of boardshorts!

Nothing to wear to go into the ocean.

Each of us gather the tools of our trade or passions.  We are

all different.  I gathered together a few pairs for him to have for

his trip.  Oh yes, the lawnmower and edge trimmer in my garage

are from him.  Embrace the difference, laugh and learn from

those who are different.  Laughing and learning are better than

judging and being critical.

all different

Reflection and introspection

Surfing isn't all about action.  For those who are

not surfers that might come  as a bit of a surprise.

As surfers we often check out the ocean from the shore

starring, watching, waiting, thinking.  Out in the lineup 

we really spend a fair amount of time quietly watching

and thoughts frequently wander beyond the next set.  

We've all sat in the ocean looking around, enjoying the

perspective from that vantage point.  We've all found

our thoughts wandering away from the waves.  Sometimes

those thoughts are meditative and reflective.

Today is Yom Kippur the holiest day in the Jewish year.

It is a day for introspection, and atonement, a chance

to mindfully look and account for our actions and thoughts.

The day also includes time to remember and honor those

who are no longer here.

As I walked the beach today checking the surf I had, what is

not an uncommon experience for a surfer.  I had a chance

to be quiet, to look around, to reflect and atone.  It's not all

about catching waves!

Simplicity and Happiness

I've been surfing the waves of Puerto Rico for over

30 years.  I love the proximity, the warm water, the

waves, and most of all, the people.  Whenever I spend

time at my place in Rincon I am reminded why, in a recent,

study the people of Puerto Rico were rated amongst the happiest

in the world.  I'm also reminded of just how far from simple

many people have made their lives.

It's a just another Sunday here in PR.  I spent an hour sitting 

talking to a friend on his porch in front of his gallery.  A few

customers stopped in,  a few other friends stopped by

to chat,  and quite a few more beeped and exchanged pleasantries

as they drove by.  Under a big tree my neighbors have begun

playing dominos.  My wife is feeding leftovers to some neighborhood

dogs.  A mother, father, two kids, and their dog are strolling up

the hill after a walk along the beach road.

What are you busy doing?  Is it really that important?  What are you

 in a hurry to do today?  Her in Rincon it seems that simplicity and happiness

go hand in hand.  Maybe we all can learn that lesson.

Confluence

Oft times in surfing we await the intersection of

seemingly unrelated factors in order to bring us

 the greatest joy.  Think about it for a few seconds. 

We need wind, daylight, swell, and tide to all come together

for those peak experiences, those unforgettable sessions.

That doesn't mean we can't have a great day without

everything coming together exactly as we'd like.  The past few

days here in NJ have been a good example.  We had the swell

but, for the most part, not the wind.  This morning we had the

wind but not the tide.  Tonight we have the tide and wind, but not

the swell.  That's life.

Yesterday morning I had a really fun session.  Sure we had a

decent bit of swell and the tide and my schedule lined up

perfectly, but, we didn't have the wind.  What I did have was

a beautiful warm, sunny morning, the chance to surf a break

with Ray, a friend with a true aloha spirit, and 2 other strangers

who were happy just being out.  I was riding a board I love and

actually scored a few great sections.  

In surfing and in life we shouldn't need everything to come together

perfectly.  If we look at the things that do come together and make

the most of what we get we can really be happy.  Sure we hope for

that perfect confluence, that perfect coming together, but life's seldom

perfect.

Wisdom of the Wave

I don't hide the fact that I am a surfer and a waterman.

There is a Greg Noll Da Cat hanging on the wall in my

office waiting room and Surfer, ESM, and Surfrider' Making

Waves are scattered amongst the more usual magazines in the

magazine rack.  Sometimes it results in some very interesting,

and I hope beneficial, interactions with my patients.

Recently a client brought in an article they'd found in the

Sunday newspaper magazine.  It was an interview with

Laid Hamilton discussing 10 lessons about life he'd learned

from his from his life as a waterman.  I love them and over

time will write about each.

The first lesson is one about humility and vulnerability.

"Know you are (but) a speck on the water".  We really aren't that

significant in the big picture, kind of like drops in the ocean or

grains of sand on the beach.  When we begin to think too much

of our own importance we can find ourselves in trouble.  A client

told me this week that Ego can stand for 'Edging God Out".  Not a

wise thing to do.  The ocean was here long before we were and 

hopefully will be here long after we are gone. 

Surfing and life are all about learning lessons and moving on to

the next lesson without forgetting what we've learned.